My friend sent me a link to Radio 4's today programme which had a section on the new Lancet Report on stillbirth. The UK seems to be doing quite badly on an international scale with stillbirth rates. 33rd internationally. No better than 10 years ago, with estimates that 1/2 of all UK stillbirths could have been prevented with earlier medical intervention.
My firm belief is that the backlash against medicalising pregnancy and childbirth has gone too far. It is a beautiful and natural thing but it is also one of the hardest physical things that either mother or baby will go through and should be treated as such.
I don't want to be branded a failure for needing an epidural if/when I have another child or for bottle feeding when I am unable to breastfeed. If these things are best for me then I will use them. If they are not for others, they don't have to.
We are told that so much is normal in pregnancy and when there are concerns they are often dismissed with an 'It's probably nothing but if you are really worried you can come in for a check.' You look at the baby books and websites and the over whelming message is not to worry, pregnancy is wonderful and natural and different in each person it's probably nothing to worry about. Complications are very rare so they probably won't happen to you. I think we all know that's not true.
We are told that so much is normal in pregnancy and when there are concerns they are often dismissed with an 'It's probably nothing but if you are really worried you can come in for a check.' You look at the baby books and websites and the over whelming message is not to worry, pregnancy is wonderful and natural and different in each person it's probably nothing to worry about. Complications are very rare so they probably won't happen to you. I think we all know that's not true.
Link to Lancet report summery http://www.uk-sands.org/no_cache/News/Newspage/article/194/22.html
Im so very sorry for your loss. I was just 17 when I lost my little boy at 31 weeks, the reason is still unknown which makes grieving alot more harder for me. I was told numerous times that bub was fine at every check up I had . But I knew in my heart that something was wrong , but they did ultra sounds and all the regular check ups and still couldn't find anything . I youse to dream when I was pregnant that my baby was taken away from me, that someone was trying to take him but I just thought it was a dream untill 5 weeks later he really was taken away . It's he's 1st birthday next month, and it just feels so wrong that he wont be here and I that I cant hold and nurture him . Thankyou for your blog, I now know that im not alone , and im honestly very very sorry for your loss, were still mothers anyone whose been through a loss of a child is a mother in my eyes, a very strong mother .
ReplyDelete